The last week and a half has been so hard! I can't believe all the shit that has happened to me...my car dies, large fight with mom, guy tries to break into apartment TWICE...then the worst part came two days ago. I was sitting at an intersection on Snelling and 94, waiting at a red light, when an armored van ran a red, hitting a truck, and in turn jumped the median and hit my drivers side full-speed. When I looked up it turns out I had been hit by two vans head-on from the side, smashing me between themselves and the F350 next to me. I couldn't even get out of the car - I had to be pulled out and passed between people until I got to the side of the road. I'm okay - the worst that happened was my hand cut up by the shattered windshield. Just very shaken up. The car was totaled, and worse, it was Ben's car. Probably one of the most horrible experiences of my life. Two different cops told Ben and I that I should be dead. All I can think about lately is looking over and seeing the van and debris coming at my face. What kept me from pulling up just a foot more and getting the hood of a car in my face? No clue.
Anyway this wasn't meant to worry anyone...what I more just want to say is how much this event has changed my outlook on life. The song I was listening to when it happened was "Wild Angels" by Martina McBride. I think that is just so creepy. I talked to Valerie on line yesterday morning and she is overseas. If something would have happened to me she never would have known until she got back in December probably. It just makes me think SO much of how lucky I am. And it sounds sick but maybe, just maybe, this happened to me so that I would come to this realization. I've been so caught up lately in ridiculous things...maybe this was just a reminder of the more simple and special ones.
For now I'm just a little bit sore from the crash but that will heal. I just want to get through all the insurance stuff that's going on because it's so much to think about. Nothing I need with classes starting up. And I just feel so guilty about Ben's car! I know it's my fault and there's nothing I could do, I was stopped and stuck...but still. Hopefully everything will turn out okay.